The Last Angry Man.

Why can't people from your past stay in the fucking past.

Pigfuckers.

So I'm angry. And I can't think straight so I'll maybe come back to this when my blood pressure gets sub 250.

All I'll say is this: If someone that you upset you and made you hate them for a while gets back in touch with you, hate them forever.

Desperate bitch.

And those of you not reading this on MySpace get the extended rant:
Fucking stupid fucking bitch. Why can nothing ever go right. I swear to God I can't go 5 fucking days without something making me feel like shit. I hate this I hate this I hate this. If it's not my last girlfriend ringing me up then it's one of my fucking "friends" moaning and bitching at me and then criticising me the ONE FUCKING TIME I COMPLAIN ABOUT ANYTHING. Ahh Jesus what's the fucking point...?

This article was written at 15:23 and has generated 3 death threats so far. Feel free to add one.

Hair is a tricky one to call right. You know you got it wrong today but fortunately you have me to set you straight. Not that I am going to tell you what to do right, no no no, I am here to show you how not to get it wrong. I know you're desperate so let us get straight into it and round up some of the worst haircuts currently being sported by the worlds D students and live-at-home twenty somethings.

1. The Bono

As well documents as my hatred of Bono and all Bono related products is, I cannot blame this man for his hair. A. He is an idiot. B. He is rich. As we all know, this rare combo is fertile ground for the seeds of tastelessness. However, if you are not rich and have some self respect, for crying out crazy do not copy this haircut. It is not even an ironically worn mullet. It is just shit.

2. The Howard.

Moe Howard was a funny man. His hair was even funnier, but please guys, I am begging you, stop emulating this shit. The thirties were a time when movie stars got paid $4 a year and did not know better. If you really need to feel hair brushing across your face then get a girlfriend (or at least a dog) and no, you will not, not with that hair.

3. Punk?

This is a picture of a punk. You are not. No really, you are not. If you can remember punk then you are in your 40's and if you cannot, you should not be trying to. I am tired of the weak-assed, punk it up on the weekend then comb it back down for work on Monday crown. If you buy into punk and what it stands for then grow some nuts, get is shaved in properly and to hell with everyone else. But if you do the gel up your regular hair trick you are just a failure. Seriously. And yes yes yes I know it attracts women. But only the stupid ones. Have some self respect fucker.

4. The "I just got out of bed".

Yeah yeah yeah, I know. "Oh he's so cute", "He's a carefree spirit", "Look at his "I don't need to look good to look good" attitude. Wrong. So deeply, deeply, wrong. You see the problem here is not so much the hair, it is the shit it is growing out og. "What?" you ask. Well, here's the thing. Every hair on that man's head has been meticulously crafted into shape over several hours. This guy didn't roll out of bed, throw on some clothes and look good. It is a complete sham. Wear your heart on the outside, dumbass. Fucking frauds.

The Hoxton Fin.

Oooooooh, isn't that guy tough? No, he's not is he. I hate the Hoxton Fin, with a passion. Sported by catering managers and Insurance sales team leaders throughout the South of England the Hoxton Fin has become synonymous with the "from-the-streets-don't-mess-with-us" white boy crowd. In reality it looks like his hair is growing over some deformity of his skull, probable where they took his brain out.

I really can't look at any more bad hair on google images today, it's like staring into the devil's asshole. I'll just leave you with some honorable mentions to the "I'm-white-but-have-a-weave", the "one-truck-of-brylcreame-a-day" and of course:


The Hoff

This article was written at 12:35 and has generated 2 death threats so far. Feel free to add one.

the a/c in one of our buildings is broken and it was 32C in there today. guess who had to spend 4 hours in the lab there. never mind.

maybe i've gone heat-stupid or i'm so dehydrated that i can't think clearly but i'm tired. so tired of a lot of things. i feel lonely all the time and isolated. i don't have any friends and i think a lot of that is to do with the fact that i'm not a particularly easy person to get along with. they had this thing in the paper yesterday where you checked things off to see if you had depression. if you scored more than 4 out of 8 you are depressed. i scored 8. but i know i don't have depression because i've seen depression and that's not it. i guess it's something else.

i don't have any motivation anymore. work takes it all out of me, not that i mind, i enjoy my job and like doing the hours. but outside of that, what's the point? i have too much self respect to be a fake. i can't play the games other people do or take part in the endless self-congratulating. and it's been like this as long as i can remember. i'm so lonely that sometimes i think i'm going to fall down on the floor and start crying for no reason. that worries me sometimes.

i want to be a writer but i think i'm a long way from putting down a sentence that i'm happy with. all the people i admire (Nin, Bukowski, Steinbeck, Capote, et al) seemed to have the same sense of disconnection from people that i have. maybe writers are like that or people who are like that become writers. i don't know. the book progresses. slowly.

i'm leaving now, more work and then home to an empty bed, in an empty life. i'll leave you with the title of the book i just finished reading:

You Get So Alone at Times That It Just Makes Sense